A Victory Over My Fears
This may seem odd, but in my case, I think I’ve just crossed a new threshold.
This afternoon, after having made sure that no typos nor spelling mistakes remained, I sent Au sein de la nuit and La Dévorante to the 5eme Saison French publishing house for their free theme. And that was… surprising. A sort of huge change in my little world.
I explain: writing, editing, sending the short story to proof-readers, applying their corrections, modifying the text hoping it’s for the best… all of this is easy. Annoying at times and leaving me with the need to rip my hair off, but easy. On the other hand, what is harder for me is to actually send the texts once I’m done with them. By doing so, I’ll now be running the risk (which is real, I admit) to see them rejected for a reason or another. I’m standing in front of failure, more than of success. And the fear of failing is something one definitely needs to triumph over. It is useless to tell oneself “I want to be published” if it’s to keep all those short stories bundled up in a drawer or on the PC, and if it’s to end up not sending the texts. (Note: I am indeed able to pull a “oh, what a shame, I had completely forgotten the deadline, now it’s too late! It’s such a shame, indeed!”)
So, it’s official: I’m ready to accept failure, and it has helped to increase my chances of getting published. Because if I don’t take part in and don’t send my stories, said chances drop to 0 anyway, right.
And even if my short stories are crappy without me realizing it, which is probably the case, at least I’ll have won something treasurable: new knowledge regarding all those little writing quirks and mistakes I should correct. (And good pals, too: the people who accepted to proof-read my stuff.)
In other words, progress came with those short stories, and I’m not afraid anymore.